It’s Not About Changing the Child — It’s About Changing How We Respond

Parenting a neurodivergent or trauma-impacted child is not for the faint-hearted.It’s love in its most courageous form — love that shows up, even on the days when you feel completely out of strength.

I’ve walked this road, too. I know how it feels when every morning starts like a storm, when the smallest request spirals into resistance or tears, and when the weight of judgment — from others or from yourself — becomes unbearable.You’re doing your best. But sometimes “your best” feels like it’s never enough.

I Get You — Because I’m Living This Experience

I don’t speak from theory alone. I speak as a parent, a therapist, and a human who has stood in the messiness of it all.That’s why, I approach every family with deep empathy and honesty. This is not about fixing a child. It’s about understanding their nervous system — and ours.

Children show us their inner world through behaviour. When they scream, hit, refuse, or shut down, they’re telling us something. Our job isn’t to silence that communication; it’s to decode it.

Regulate Ourselves First

When we feel triggered, frustrated, or helpless, our nervous system speaks louder than our words. A dysregulated adult cannot calm a dysregulated child — and yet, this is the part we have the most power to change.

I help parents and carers build awareness of their own stress responses, learn grounding tools, and create moments of calm connection. Because when we regulate first, we create safety. And when children feel safe, they can begin to learn, trust, and grow.

Acceptance Before Change

True change begins with acceptance — not of the behaviours, but of the child’s underlying needs. It’s about saying, “I see you. I get that this is hard for you. Let’s figure it out together.”

From there, we can work on gentle strategies that align with your child’s strengths, sensory profile, and developmental needs. Whether it’s through play therapy, emotion coaching, or behaviour support, the goal remains the same: to nurture connection before correction.

Let’s Work Together - the Journey Starts from Us

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure where to begin, know this: you don’t have to do it alone. Change happens when we slow down, get curious, and shift from control to connection. It’s not about perfection — it’s about presence. I walk beside you with empathy, evidence-based tools, and lived experience. Together, we’ll build the foundation of safety and understanding your family needs to thrive — starting with ourselves.

比起改变孩子，更重要的是改变我们的回应方式

养育一位神经多样或经历过创伤的孩子，从来都不是一条轻松的路。这是一种深沉的爱——一种即使在筋疲力尽时依然选择留下的勇气。我也走过这条路。我知道那种感觉——当每个早晨都像暴风雨来临，当最小的要求都可能引发情绪爆发或崩溃，当来自他人甚至自己内心的评判让你喘不过气。你已经尽力了，但有时「尽力」似乎永远不够。

我懂，因为我也经历着

我不是只从理论出发，而是以一个家长、治疗师、也作为一个在人生混乱中学习前行的人来说这些话。这也是为什么我始终以深刻的共情与真实面对每一个家庭。这不是在改变孩子，而是去理解他们的神经系统——也理解我们自己的。孩子透过行为在表达他们的内心世界。当他们尖叫、打人、拒绝或关闭自己时，他们其实在告诉我们一些事。我们的任务不是让这些行为消失，而是去理解背后的信息。

先调节自己，才能帮助孩子

当我们被触发、感到沮丧或无助时，我们的神经系统往往比言语更响亮。一个失调的成人，无法安抚一个失调的孩子——但这恰恰是我们最有能力去改变的部分。这就是为什么我帮助父母和照顾者觉察自己的压力反应，学习扎根与平静的技巧，创造安全的连结时刻。因为当我们先调节自己时，我们就创造了安全。而当孩子感受到安全，他们才能真正开始学习、信任与成长。

接纳先于改变

真正的改变始于接纳——不是接纳那些具有挑战的行为，而是接纳孩子内在的需要。这是一种态度：「我理解你。我知道这对你来说很难。我们一起面对吧。」

从这种理解出发，我们可以制定温和、适合孩子优势、感官需求与发展阶段的策略。无论是透过游戏治疗、情绪教练或积极行为支持，目标始终如一：先建立连结，再谈改变。

让我们一起前行——旅程从我们开始

如果你此刻感到卡住、疲惫或迷茫，请记住：你并不孤单。当我们放慢脚步、深呼吸、带着好奇心去面对，而不是急着掌控，改变就开始发生。关键不是完美，而是陪伴。我将以共情、实证为本的工具与自身经验陪你同行。我们将一起为我们的家庭建立安全与理解的基础——一切，从父母开始。